I Have Turned Into My Mother

Karma.  Payback.  Reaping what you sow.  What goes around, comes around. . .

I am sure my Mother is in heaven right now smiling (maybe even laughing) at me.  I have lost count of the numerous things I have done and said this week that were just like her. Many of those times I wanted to pick up the phone and call her to apologize for being so hard on her.  Decisions she made about my clothes, hair, our personal lives, privacy, etc. were brought to my mind this week for numerous reasons.

The perpetual light bulb went off in my head so much this week, and the realization of why Mother did things the way she did them was so evident.  The admiration I have for her now is even more profound because there were times she could have really put me in my place for disagreeing with her.  Instead, she just quietly let me be hard on her.

I am not quite sure why the mother/daughter relationship is like this, but I have witnessed it first hand with Charlotte.  The desire to be independent about clothes, hair, make-up, friendships, privacy, and many more things sometimes drives a huge wedge between a mother and daughter.  However, just like in the story of the Prodigal’s son, my Mother was always willing to forgive and accept with arms wide open.

If I could call my Mother today and apologize for every fit I pitched about clothes, hair, or any other decision she made at which I rolled my eyes, I certainly would.  Deep in my heart, I know my Mother knows even now how much I appreciate every decision she made on my behalf.

This picture is a classic, yet simple example of my Mother standing firm on a decision.

Mom

I found this picture this week and immediately remembered the Saturday we had these pictures made.  We were at my Grandmother’s house in Anderson getting dressed for pictures, and I stood in my Grandmother’s bedroom and sobbed because I DID NOT want to wear this particular outfit. I hated jumpers and plaid shirts.  My eyes are visibly red and puffy in this picture.  Mom has her usual perfect glow and her smile still melts my heart.  Her skin was always so perfect, and I always remember thinking her make-up was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen.  I still buy make-up she used to wear when I am missing her a little more than usual.  Needless to say, I made a visit to the Lancome counter this week.

So Mom, if there is internet in heaven and you can read this. . .

Thank you.  Thank you for teaching me the value of sensible fashion, especially on picture day.  Thank you for being the best example during difficult days, even when I made you think you were making wrong choices.  Thank you for standing firm in your decisions when I made it hard.  I promise your influence has helped me more THIS WEEK than you will ever know.  I have never been more thankful for you than I am right now.  Thank you for being such an example of strength.  I still draw from that strength every minute of every day.

I hope this picture makes you laugh like it made me.  I am so glad I found it.

Happy Mother’s Day Week.

Amy

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One thought on “I Have Turned Into My Mother

  1. I love this. I am my momma too! And I was missing the woman who raised her, my Great Grandma Gray this week. And sometimes I hear her voice, and my moms come out of my own mouth. That is scary, and surprisingly wonderful as well.

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