Today is Good Friday, and my mind immediately goes to remembering Good Friday last year. The pain of losing my Mother was debilitating, but I knew I had to keep going. The pain is not as fresh, but it is still there in many ways. Good Friday in the life of a Christian is definitely a day of reflection. As I reflect today, I am going to re-blog my post from one year ago. The hope I spoke of last year seems brighter and much more evident today. We have learned much over this past year. We have realized the importance of appreciating the current time we have together. We have realized the importance of friends and family. We have realized the things we used to complain about are things we would give anything for now. During a hectic holiday, it is easy to complain about the many family functions we must attend. When you lose someone you love so dearly, you would give anything to re-create those family functions, photo opportunities, hurried lunches after church, egg hunts etc.
While we are so very thankful for the time we all have together today, we must reflect on our past gatherings as well. We are thankful for so very much, but we are especially thankful for the HOPE we have been given because of the message Good Friday brings. –
As a Good Friday reflection, here is my blog post from last year. . .
Good Friday Hope Written Apr 6, 2012 4:37am
3 weeks can seem like 10 years when grief is so painfully present in every aspect of your life. My flesh wants to completely skip every holiday and special event for the next year. I am scared of the emotions we will feel going through them without Mom. Daddy and I were shopping for the children (as Mom would want us to do) and I looked at him – in the middle of the mall- and said “how are we going to get through Easter?” His reply – “Amy, Easter is what gives us our hope to make it through all of this!” Wow. His wisdom in the midst of grief spoke volumes to me.
It is Good Friday, and my Mother would be picking up Bread in the shape of bunnies from Good Harvest. She would be running last minute errands to get just the right things to put in all of our Easter baskets. (Yes, she still gave me my Easter basket from when I was small and would fill it with things I love now.) She would call me and tell me her Easter menu over and over, making sure she did not leave one thing out. She would drive to Strossner’s Bakery to pick up a special dessert for us then buy way too many Easter cupcakes for the children. She would go to Moppets to pick up one more bow for Charlotte in case the other 3 she bought were not good enough choices. She would continue to think of things to do for US to make sure Easter was as special as it could be.
So, in the spirit of my Mother, I am doing all of this today. But I will do it with a great sadness in my heart. I find it so fitting that this looming sadness will be felt on Good Friday, the day we as Christians know as the day Jesus died for us. The pain and sadness God felt is no comparison to mine. However, in my small, human mind, I can try to comprehend it. In the midst of my sadness today, THERE IS HOPE. There is hope I will see my Mother again because of what happened on Good Friday. There is hope for peace in the midst of our most painful circumstances. Death comes laden with sadness. So to be completely honest, I have no joy in the midst of thinking of Mother’s death today. But I do have hope. I have hope that one day I will have joy again. I have hope because of Good Friday. Actually, the hope comes from what happened AFTER Good Friday. I believe in the resurrection of Christ, and I believe that one day I will be reunited with my Mother because of that.
“…weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning.” -Psalm 30:5