He is before all things, and in Him all things hold together. – Colossians 1:17
As 2012 comes to a close, I can’t seem to find adequate words to explain my feelings. As much as I would like to close my eyes and pretend events in 2012 did not exist, I realize that is not a possibility. I have learned many things. I have made many choices, both wise and unwise. I have done things that would make my Mother proud, and I have done things she would seriously want me to reconsider.
I am overwhelmed when I think about the memories of 2012. In spite of the bad, there has been much good. There have been milestones created with the children that I don’t ever want to forget. New friendships have been made. Old relationships have become much stronger, and we have realized the importance of family in our lives now, more than ever.
There is still that one relationship that constantly evolves and always brings great thought and question to my mind every day. It is a relationship that brings comfort in a way I never imagined. I have questioned this relationship. I have been so angry with this relationship that I wanted to scream. I have been transparent with this relationship more than I ever have in my life. I have also realized there is nothing I could say or do that could separate me from the love this relationship has to offer. This relationship I speak of is my relationship with God.
I still don’t have the answers to questions I started asking this time last year. I probably have more questions at this point. However, I keep going back to 2 things.
1. I will never have the capacity to understand the answers, and I am okay with that (or at least I am today).
2. The message of this video below (that I have probably watched hundreds of times) still amazes me and brings me comfort.
There are days I still need to be reminded, in God, ALL THINGS HOLD TOGETHER. There are days I feel like I am crumbling into a million little pieces, but I choose to believe GOD HOLDS US TOGETHER. As 2012 comes to a close, I am so very thankful for the knowledge of how vast the love is that God has for us. I am thankful for the reminder, HE is the only one who can truly hold us together.